June 2024
Traditions That Sustain Us
I knew that I wanted to have an old fashioned summer. June always reminds me of my father. Father’s Day, his birthday, and anniversary were all in June. I can’t help but remember what a wonderful man that my father was and what our summers were like growing up on a farm in the 50s and early 60s. Men like my father knew what they stood for and kept their promises.
What was wonderful about your father?
When I examine those summers I can pinpoint what makes them so special and memorable. We were protected from sensationalism and negativity. There was no internet and TV watching was minimal. Hours were spent swimming and fishing in our little farm pond. At night we sat outside and watched fireflies. These memories inspired me to make my patios into an inviting area to visit, relax, and enjoy nature. Let’s put down our phones, turn off the TV, and sit outside for a while.
How do you enjoy nature?
We are all so overly stimulated by the media. No one is satisfied with their situation or surroundings. Gratitude has gone missing. Gratitude is highly correlated with wellbeing and happiness. It’s not wrong to want to better yourself, but constantly striving is pernicious if you don’t stop to savor what you’ve already accomplished. My father loved to decorate and landscape, but always took the time to appreciate our home and farm. As a result, I have always enjoyed my surroundings even though I have never had granite, quartz or marble counter tops!
What should you be savoring?
The media has spawned a plague of self-comparison, low self-esteem and depression. We have become duped by phony Facebook personas. It’s mandatory that we establish our own identities by examining what we really value and to be clear about what we really stand for even if it’s not “popular”. You are not your Facebook page. Who you really are is reflected in your actions, how you lead your everyday life, and the way you treat others. As a coach, my mission is to help people to celebrate their unique talents and discover their purpose in life. It’s time to turn off the media for a minute and see if we are leading the kind of life that we really want to have.
What are your actions telling people about you?
I continue to explore the necessity of deciding what’s really important and eliminating the superfluous. You have to make difficult decisions. We are studying this in the Who’s in Your Room?” training that I’m taking from Dr. Ivan Misner, founder of BNI (Business Network International), and Isaac Stegman, a successful business coach. It’s about getting back to what really works for you and what you really believe to be true about life. Rabbi Daniel Lapin, author of “Thou Shall Prosper,” explains how we can use ancient wisdom to be successful. Don’t try to reinvent the wheel. Instead of being lured into the latest trend, it may be wiser to use approaches that have stood the test of time.
Where do you look for wisdom?
That’s why I want to see people establish meaningful traditions. As a former child psychologist, I believe that we have done children a big disservice by buying them too many toys and letting them spend hours with phones and televisions. When parents do spend time with children they seem compelled to constantly entertain them. Whatever happened to learning to amuse yourself and playing outside?
Are you comfortable to sit in silence without your “devices”?
My father established family traditions that were enriching. He taught us our work ethic by having us work together to do chores, clean the house and make the yard look nice. He was a perfect example of how quality can trump quantity. My father was busy with work; he didn’t attend our birthday parties or take us to amusement parks. One thing he did do was to pray with us every night before bed. This had such a profound effect on me that several nights ago I dreamed that I was a teenager living at home and my father and I were praying together before bedtime. The dream was as vivid as current reality and so comforting. My father has been gone for almost 50 years but his memory and traditions still sustain me.
What traditions sustain you?
My father was deeply religious but never talked about it. His actions were louder than words. I judge other’s in this way. I deplore business owners who use “the Christian card” to get customers. Your values should be apparent in your actions not just your verbiage. Recently, I was uplifted by meeting a young business man who knows what he stands for and keeps his promises. He is Taylor McClure, owner of Legacy Plumbing (417-559-5343). Taylor has taken the Values in Action Survey and his top 5 values are Spirituality, Honesty, Kindness, Gratitude, and Judgement. It is clear that he lives his values. Taylor is married, has 3 children, and is from Spokane, Missouri. In addition to running his own business, Taylor serves in the National Guard and is a Youth and Nursing Home Pastor through his church. Obviously, he is not afraid of work and cares about other people. I‘m skeptical of people I don’t know, but as I got to know Taylor through BNI I began to trust him enough to have him update my plumbing. He was very respectful and explained that he wanted to give a home owner “a professional diagnosis so that they could have full confidence in their plumbing when he left.” He did just that! It was so refreshing to see a young man building a business built on solid principles.
What principles undergird your business?
If you want to enjoy a simple weekend in the country and get in touch with your values and traditions, visit my vacation rental in Buffalo, Missouri. Sit quietly on the patio and gain clarity and perspective.
https://evolve.com/vacation-rentals/us/mo/buffalo/462541?queryID=2c2f70dd5b526a4ad69f3561a0e8645d
https://evolve.com/vacation-rentals/us/mo/buffalo/462542?queryID=2c2f70dd5b526a4ad69f3561a0e8645d
